Homemade Mustard Piquante

The Lowdown:

Addictions, like individuals, come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes. Some people are addicted to drugs or alcohol. Some are addicted to food. Some are addicted to porno or war movies. Others are addicted to glue. And then, there are those who are like me - addicted to condiments (maybe a few of the aforementioned as well). Not just any condiments though. Mustards and hot sauces always catch my attention. No joke, I just counted seven types of mustard and five types of hot sauce in my fridge. That also wasn't including the left over packages of McDonald's hot mustard. I don't know why, but I just can't resist that yellow death.

I wish I could say that as I matured, my tastes matured as well. They didn't. I still love hotdogs, hamburgers, Kraft Dinner, pizza pops, and cream soda. So I started to think that maybe I should just start making these things at home. Really, if you take out all of the preservatives they aren't all that bad for you. In the end, everything is about balance. Unfortunately, I balance eating hamburgers from the quaint little chain known as McDonald's and homemade delicious food.

A dream of mine is to stumble across a restaurant that makes plain food, but has an extensive list of condiments. In this dream there are hundreds of condiments, all homemade of course, listed by cuisine region. They would be paired with food,  like wines are in most restaurants. The possibilities would be endless. Take a burger for example. How sexy would it be if you got to choose from dozens of mustards, dozens of BBQ sauces, or whatever you fancied. What if you took those classics and added spice, sweetness, savouriness, or tartness. What if you wanted a clubhouse with a tarragon, white wine mustard and a honey-lime, Cajun aioli? What if you wanted a Jamaican jerk ketchup to dip your fries in?

Well, these are all things that I want, and until now I never though about trying to make a homemade condiment. Why would you? They are cheap to buy, and chances are you have enough of them in our fridges to survive a nuclear fall out. But lets face it, we all got into cooking because we wanted to push our boundaries. Whether we want to cook to save money, cook to prove something, cook to explore flavours - we all want to push our personal expectations. To be honest, making mustard shouldn't be considered pushing any sort of boundary; however, it seems to be one of those things that nobody really thinks about. This was one of those times that I just let go, and said, "why not?"

If you're interested in the history of the mustard seed (which is quite interesting) click here.

The Playlist:

1/2 cup Ground mustard

6 tbsp Mustard seeds*

1 tsp Turmeric

4 tbsp Red wine vinegar (good quality)

1 Bhut jolokia, dried**

5 Chili pequin, dried

2 Thai chili peppers, dried

1/2 cup Red wine (or water or combination of both)

* White are the most mellow, red are much spicier (the nasal spicy), and black, if you can find them, are the spiciest.

** Using these dried allows for the flavour and a bit of the spiciness to come out. A fresh bhut jolokia pepper in this recipe would be way too much for the average person to handle.

The Skinny:

1. Crush the red mustard seeds, with a mortar and pestle or coffee grinder, so that the majority of them remain intact.
2. Grind the spicy peppers into a fine powder. I was given these peppers from a co-worker who loves spicy food. If you can't get a hold of these, feel free to use whatever peppers you like.
3. Add all of the ingredients together and mix until a paste is formed. Place in a glass jar, seal, refridgerate and allow to sit for a few days before use.

Featured on: 33 Shades of Green, Mandy's Recipe Box, Chef in Training, Food Renegade

Stay rad - h